Art imitating life???

Some unsolicited doodles/portraits of me, made for me:

January 2018
by Ms. C (a cool colleague)

November 2019
by Ms. W (dear friend)

June (?) 2021
by Ms. D (another cool colleague)

I am definitely aging.

Banana Manna > "Banana Bread"

I recently bought twenty overly ripe bananas on Flashfoods for $1.50 so naturally I had to make banana bread, except I've never baked before!  And then the recipe I use (https://thewoksoflife.com/banana-bread/) calls for a cup of sugar.  A can of pop is about 30g of sugar. 

One cup of sugar is 225g!!!!!!

Who's the genius who thought it should be called "banana bread?" This is literally cake!  And when I add chocolate chips (because all banana bread should be required to have chocolate in it) it's defos cake.

And then it hit me...  The Israelites received bread from heaven in the desert or manna as they called it.  The baked goods I'm creating are a literal gift from God since they're made with my hands.  And the taste and smell of this cake? Mmmm heavenly.  Bingo, bango, BANANA MANNA!  It even rhymes! Bongo!

Banana Manna is such a better name than "banana bread" that it's crazy no one has thought of this before!!!!  Except I just did a google search and I'm wrong (yet again).

God bless this woman and her Banana Manna.

Behold

Banana Manna

It tasted better the next day.

No blog posts in 2020 AD

 ...but I kept paying for theTerriblelands.com domain name!  I get credit for that!
Or rather my credit was charged because of it...

Anyways, I had intentions to write since COVID-19 provided more time for me to be at home and reflect on life in general as the pandemic shuttered all my other obligations and opportunities.  Instead I got sidetracked with Netflix, food (eg Flashfood baby! Use my referral: https://flashfood.app.link/B8XzcgOZsfb), gardening in pots, growing avocado seeds, not exercising, and general procrastinating.  

And continuing to grow my hair out of course.

Pointless Post #108 - Greatest Fear Edition

I think one of my greatest fears would be that if I was using a toilet in a public restroom and for the fire alarm to suddenly go off.  The instantaneous shift from eerily, silent peace and quiet (assuming no one else is in there) to a mind-numbing shrill of the alarm would probably be enough to knock me off the porcelain throne.

This is all hypothetical of course.

This picture makes me happy

If I remember right, it's from a Panago commercial where one of the taglines is "Greek is crazy," and it's featuring their Greek-inspired menu options.

If I were to psychoanalyze myself, I'd probably say I take joy in this image because I have unresolved, unfulfilled dreams of being a rock star and I'm able to see a happier version of myself portrayed as a musically talented, tzatziki-covered gyro, rocking out on a television screen as snippets of take out food flash interspersed to the beat of catchy electronic music.

It oozes with confidence and fire roasted umami flavours.
It's probably a better driver than me as well.
Man alive.

---------------
June 9, 2018 EDIT: Oh man, I'm totally wrong.  It's from Subway Canada:


AND I JUST GOT IT!
It's a gyro rocking out with a guitar.
A rocking gyro.
A guitar gyro.
aka a Guitar Hero.

Gold.

Permalink: https://j.gifs.com/xv0nqP.gif

Pointless Post #107 - Priorities Edition Revisited

While talking with a female colleague:

Colleague: [blah blah blah] ...and my ten-year career plan.
Me: [with a look of amazement at her and simultaneous disgust at myself] Ten-year plan??? I don't even know what I'm eating for dinner tonight!

This is one of the differences between men and women.

---------------------------------------------

Last night I reached for my spool of floss and pulled out a tiny, waxed thread only to discover that I had run out of floss.  Shortly after, I went to bed wondering when I had last purchased floss...

This morning while examining that same spool to make sure I was indeed out of floss (half asleep last night), I discovered my handwriting on the bottom of the container in black sharpie.  I felt an immense sense of closure, smiled to myself, and them updated it with another date in blue sharpie. 

Good job past-Tim, good job.

~13 months to use 183m.  Not bad.

How to Make Instant Pot Chicken Noodle Soup (w/pictures!)

Super simple and super delicious!  A defos easy comfort food staple.  Soup for everyone!

1.  I chopped up some carrots, celery, and one onion and put it in the Instant Pot.  I used straight-from-the-freezer chicken thighs and put them in the center of the veggies and added water.

2. I set the cook time to Manual > High Pressure > ~25 min (20 min probably would've sufficed).  This is what came out:

3. I deboned and shredded the chicken and added some generous handfuls of elbow macaroni, a slab of butter, pepper, salt, and thyme.  I also seasoned my shredded chicken before putting it back in.

4. After stirring everything well, I put the chicken thigh bones back in for more flavour.

5.  After setting the cook time to Manual > High Pressure > 10 min (I'm really into overcooking things... I'm thinking 5min would've been plenty), this is what came out:

6. Stirred, bowled, and ready to eat!

7. And then I spilled it everywhere because I'm a klutz.  The hot soup burned my thigh through my sweatpants a little.  I also said a few choice words.

8. Sigh, the end.

In other news, my couch has a beautiful and comforting aroma now...

I can be very easily amused

Dairy is dairy

In this last week of 2017, I consumed a lot of half and half (10% fat) and whipping cream (30% fat) at a 90% rate of personal satisfaction and 10% rate of shameful regret (hence this blog post).  I didn't plan to; it just happened (insert punchline and/or murder alibi here).  I didn't want either dairy product to go to waste, so I thought it was better for me to consume it.  And I did! :D :D :D

No Frills had a crazy sale on Christmas Eve where 500ml cartons of half and half were being sold for 10¢/each.  TEN CENTS EACH.  What a steal!  The caveat is that the best before date was Dec 25, but that didn't bother me.  It's on sale for ten cents!  I don't use creamer in my everyday life.  I don't even drink coffee regularly, but at 10 freaking cents?!?  Come on!  I bought one* litre's worth of half and half.  Happy birthday Jesus and happy birthday to me!

The whipping cream that came into my possession was an opened 1L carton from my sister who had needed it for a soup recipe.   Unfortunately for her, she only needed 250ml, but the store was only selling 1L size cartons.  She had all this leftover whipped cream and no more use for it.  I wasn't planning on making on cream soups or pastas in the next little bit, so the only rationale option was for me to whip it and eat it.

As my momentous, dare I say it, legen-dairy year comes to a close, I can confidently share these two lessons I've learned from ingesting all this creamalicious goodness and that is:

1. If you're making a milkshake and substitute half and half for the milk, the taste is marginal.  Actually no, it'll taste creamier and better than regular, dumb old 2% milk. 10/10 I'd do it again.

2. Beating (or in my case blending) 500ml of whipped cream into a nice, billowy glob and eating it is healthier than drinking 500ml of liquid whipped cream straight.  I mean, it's science.  It's lighter.

Goodbye old friend...

 *946ml give me a break

You should watch the smash holiday movie classic "Jingle All the Way"

It has nostalgia!  It has brilliant one-liners!  It has SINBAD!

While watching this movie late last night, I googled "get outta my way box" and was very pleased to see my favourite scene was uploaded on YouTube.  It's not the best quality, but the humour transcends it:


The clip ends too soon, but the way the other ornaments come over to look at their box-friend just kills me every time. Oh man, hahahahaha!

Les lapins ce soir, avant le noir (du nuit)

I'm running out of French rhymes.

I saw multiple rabbits last week late in the evening before it got dark!  I actually saw three of them.

I've also seen them multiple times this week too.  I don't think I'll post about seeing Mr. Bun anymore (mostly because there's definitely more than one Mr. Bun), but they sure are cute.  Rabbits in the wild!

Somewhere in there....

You'll be able to see....

A blurry rabbit.

And if you pan left a little bit...

There's another!  Yummy.

And later in the evening on another day...

I said a hip hop the hippie the hippie

To the hip hip hop and you don't stop

RIP Chalkboard Mug

January 2014 - September 2017

We had a good run, 794 photos or so.  It slipped out of my hands as I was walking to the kitchen to refill it with hot water.  Life is tough.

Here's a look back on better times:

Real men pack their own lunches

There was an article I read a few years ago that talked about why Mark Zuckerberg (and other people) wears the same thing everyday and how it's about saving time and energy in decision making.  Even though the article was about physical appearances, I applied the idea to my noon time meal habits and since January of this year, I've been "making" and packing the exact same lunch about 95% of the time.

For about ten months in 2016, I did something similar where I'd make two wraps for lunch every day (whole wheat tortilla with potato salad, vegetable, and chicken nuggets as filling), but when 2017 hit, I wanted to simplify it even more. 

I cut out the tortillas and potato salad, and thus the national standard of the utilitarian, bachelor's home made lunch was born.

My female colleagues seem to be very intrigued and yet appalled at this, but this is what I eat every day for lunch:

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Four chicken nuggets and a few handfuls of boiled cauliflower, broccoli, and carrots (aka California-mix).  I prepare several day's worth of meals in a batch (I've never tried doing a whole week's worth...the nuggets are already pretty soggy by Wednesday):

Mon-Wed meal prep done on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

I eat at my desk, cold from the fridge (which curiously appalls another female colleague even more).

One of my cousins said she does something similar (packing lunches for work in batches) except she makes sandwiches for the week and freezes them.  She's more hardcore than me; I'm not fond of the idea of eating thawed, chilled bread.  But we both agreed that the benefit in savings is great!

Special thanks to the  FÖRTROLIG food container from IKEA for making this post possible.  Regular price at $3.49 or $2.99 when on sale!  I went to university.